Israel


so, I’m nearing the end of my second tour (well part 1 of it) and almost 5 weeks on the road, I haven’t sent out a single postcard BUT this next story gives you a little insight as to why.

 

So, I leave Jerusalem last Friday (May 30) on Nesher ( a share taxi) to get to the Tel Aviv airport.  I leave around 8 pm with a flight at 11:30 thinking it’s more than enough time.  Of course I forget that we have to pick up 6 other people from all over Jerusalem and wouldn’t you know I get the crazy driver on the sabbath.  Jeru is a ghost town and this doesn’t help as streets are closed off.  So I’m sitting in the backseat, rocking out, hoping and praying we get to the airport before 10 so I can get through security in time.  No big deal, everywhere else it has taken me 35 minutes total.  Someone may have mentioned that they recommend 3 hours before in Israel but come on, that’s silly, right?

Wrong.  We roll in at 9:45.  Sweet.  I pay the man, toss my bags on a cart and steer it in.  First, I sit in a line to check my luggage thru security before I can even check in for my flight.  I get questioned by 3 different people and asked the same 10 questions over and over.  Though it makes sense, I don’t have an Israeli stamp in my passport and I’m going to Syria in a few weeks so I’m suspect already.  I get a 5 put on my bag and pass thru the first checkpoint.

Then I go to check my luggage checked out before getting my ticket.  Apparently 5 isn’t a good thing and my checked bag needs to be completely unpacked (which I spent 20 minutes doing so it would all fit perfectly) and all my inner bags need to be unpacked.  She swabs my luggage with some thing, gets checked by another lady then I can pack everything back up, while being watched and sent to check in.  I was also questioned several times as to why I don’t have a paper ticket.  It’s an e-ticket peple and I’m traveling. 

I check in for my flight but since I have a backpack it needs to go in oversized luggage.  I go to drop this off but need to pass by someone checking tickets and passports.  Something is amiss and I have to follow her back to where my luggage was searched.  Apparently a number wasn’t checked off and it looked like I hadn’t had my baggae checked.  We get that settled and I drop off my bag. 

I grab some water and a coke, trying to spend the last of my shekels, and head to another security checkpoint.  Ticket and passport checked again and I walk to be screened.  I get motioned over to a less frequented security checkpoint and I take off all my metal and anything else.  I hand them my passport, get a look from them and head through.  I’m sitting there, waiting for my bags, smirking at all the ites people are trying to carry through, like a 16 piece knife set.  Come on people.  Knives, on a plane?!  That wouldn’t fly even before tighter regulations. 

So, I’m waiting and  getting slightly impatient but try to appear compliant.  I get asked the usual questions of who packed this, was it out of your sight. The security girl starts to unpack things from my bag to run it through security again and asks me the following question: So, did you just graduate high school, are you doing a gap year?  Di

d I just graduate high school?!  The last time I mistaken as 6 years younger was when I showed Kevin a picture of me from freshman year track and he said I looked nine years old.  Hence why I almost always wear makeup now. 

No, I respond, I graduated from ollege two years ago and I’m just traveling for a few months.  She says, oh, you look young.  (Well yes, if you’re going off my passport picture (I was 16) and my slightly disheveled state then yes, I look younger but not 18!)  She then goes on to say how she’d like to travel but she’s in school and has too much responsibility.  I’m once again reminded (and humbled) about how lucky I am to live in the States, have money to travel and the desire to do so. 

The head of security comes over and starts asking me questions saying you’re the one who is traveling for a while and going through Syria.  Yep, they know me now.  I tell her there aren’t any sharp objects and yes I did pack it.  She looks at the screen asking if I have anything metal, a bullet perhaps?  I’m slightly taken aback until I realize there’s a 90 year old bullet in my bag from a battlefield at Gallipoli. 

You read that right, a ninety year old bullet.

I made it through all of Turkey’s checkpoints, getting into Israel, and through most of the beginning checkpoints to forget about the bullet that’s so rusted and crusted over it wouldn’t work anyway.  I start to profusely apologize and explain but she just gives me a look that says Dumb American, finds the bullet and tosses it into the confiscated bin.  I’m left to pack my bag and get through passport control in 15 minutes before my flight begins to board. 

Brilliant, now I just need to jump the hurdle of explaining why here is no stamp in my passport and not get one in there so I can enter Syria.  I hop into a line that looks like it feeds into two booths.  But then somehow people split the line and I get stuck behind 5 rows of couples who decide to go through singly.  I’m pacing, cursing silently and wanting to hit something as I have 3 minutes to get there.  FInally, I get up there, quickly start to explain myself but the woman says, oh ok no stamp.  She stamps my boarding ticket and I sail through. 

This is just 3 hours friends.

I settle into my half hour flight, get through oOrdan and buy a visa so I don’t have to do it later, worrying that maybe they said I came from Tel Aviv and possibly ruining my entrance into Syria but I forget it.  I find some chairs to lay on, roll out the sleeping bag Matt P. gave me and settle in to read and try to sleep away the next 8 hours.  (By the way, Amman has a terrible airport, at least my terminal.  Smelling of smoke, dirty bathrooms, and just generally gross.  I’d rather be in Detroit). 

I attempt to board my flight when they call me but the security tell me to wait 10 minutes.  Another woman tries but gets told the same thing.  We sit and a line of men form.  2 minutes later they pull back the rope and let the men through.  The woman and I roll our eyes, join the line and get motioned to a security point with a woman where we go behind a curtain and are patted down.  The men get to walk right through.  Love this country.  As I wait I realize that there are 5 women on the flight, 3 with kids and a lot of men.  That is til we’re settled in and an Indian tour group comes on with mostly women. 

The flight to Cairo is uneventful.  I purchase my visa, get hassled about a cab and have to go to 2 different terminals to find an ATM.  I hop into an old black cab, fear the driving and end up paying more than I should.  They always try to squeeze you.  I settle into my hotel, sorta.  I have to wait for my room, telling me 5 minutes but it’s more like 20.  Eventually I hop on the overpriced internet, just barely finshing before our meeting.  I meet a bunch of aussies and we set off on a tour of Cairo.  To a mosque and a couple of street markets we go.  And the staring is back in full force.  As is the shouting of Shakira, Shakira.  It’s good to be back. 

We’re kicking it outside a bazaar, smiling at the locals and I play with a baby.  Then I notice all these kids running around playing soccer in front of a mosque.  I ditch the sandals, bag and sunnies and join them, entrtaining the entire crowd and surprising many people by being a white westerner playing soccer and not totally sucking.  I’m dripping sweat, my feet are nasty and I must rest as some of the kids start fighting and I don’t want to be the cause.  Some kids ask me to keep playing but we have to go to a Sufi dancing show.  We head back across the street and sit in a hot open air room.  We’re an hour early so I ask Adam, a canadian who just met up with our tour group, if he wants to go for a walk. 

Thus begins a 1.5 hour adventure involving: getting lost on the backstreets of Cairo, me wearing a tank top and jeans (totally flashy there) which elicits shouts, disgusted stares and a kid sticking his tongue out at me, a furniture market, a picture with a goat, getting several wrong directions, many more leers, a few marriage proposals, one time of actually being scared and finally finding a soldier who stops a passing man who speaks english. He gives us the right directions.  We make our way back, catch 15 minutes of the dancing and questions about where we were.  We answer while following our guide so we can get 75 cent falafel.  It is delicious.  We head back in a cab, grab some water and fanta from the corner kiosk and I fall into bed.

And that’s just my first day.

Sitting in Matt’s kitchen area this morning, munching on the delicious omelette he made, I got this feeling in my heart: longing/slight homesickness/a general missing of you.  Now when I say you, I really mean several people and places but it felt individual.  Not overwhelming but specific.  It’s been so long since I felt I really fit somewhere, not thinking about the next place I’m going and I realized what I had built in Minnesota in such a short while.  Yes, at times LA was fun, but these past few months felt complete.  I was more sure of myself and my place in life.  

Does this mean I regret leaving or want to come home?  Hell no!  I love what I am doing, where I’m gonna be going and the people I’ve met so far.  It’s just a nice realization that if I decide I need to come home early/when I do come home, I’ll be going back to a great place, not just one of transition.  

And I do miss you (yes, YOU!)

I began the morning in a foul mood.  Well, once I remembered foolish things said and done, emotions felt and guilt possessing me.  As I tried to push these thoughts out of my head, I fell into a familiar pattern:  stuck in a thought without an outer action, then trying to do something else while the thoughts macheted their way back into the forefront jungle of my mind.

So I did what I always need to do: surrender to those thoughts and feelings, hoping that processing them will make them stop.   This works, briefly, but then I settle into state of slight discontent.

 

I needed to do my laundry today,  desperately.  Mostly desperately.  I borrowed a shirt from Matt and put on the one skirt I brought (not worn since ‘the incident’) which I later discovered has a small stain on it.  I easily found my way to the laundry, put in my shekels and let it roll.

 But then I began to ponder drying my clothes.  Should I?  Is it just a waste of money?  Matt said he hasn’t dried his clothes since he’s been here but alas, I am more picky and want my jeans dry now.  They’re my new security blanket and the closest thing I have to be fashionable, my fall back blanket.  I choose to dry but realize that the bill feeder on the machine is broken and I must rustle up some shekel coins.  I had heard of a mini mart and seen signs but not stumbled upon it.  I head out, wander for 7 minutes yet feeling much longer, increasingly frustrated and self conscious of my actions.  

Sidenote:  I hate being self conscious.  I hate valuing other people’s opinions yet it was the exact reason I was in such a bad mood this morning.  And it is usually the source of many of my varied frustrations.  I do not understand (or rather am just jealous of) those who don’t ever seem to care what others think, nor have they ever.  I get that in fleeting glimpses.  I hope for it everyday but perhaps it just needs to flow.  

Conceding to my lack of knowledge I suck it up and ask someone.  ”Just around the corner.”  Of course it is.  I enter, purchase the three things I get in every country (a can of Coke, Snickers bar and large water.  2 of these purchases need to stop) and receive my shekel coins.  Laundry is dropped in to dry and I have 30 minutes to fill.  (yes, Mr. Cwodzinski, fill.  I take this advice with me everywhere I go and spread it like Israel hummus on fresh pita: most generously).  

Not knowing what to do, I step outside into the sun and glance to my left at the playground.  Presumably for those students with children.  There is a swing set with 2 seats.  Reminiscing about how much fun I always had as a child, I head towards them.

My, how time has changed things.  The swings are much lower to the ground than I remember and the metal hooks dig slightly into my womanly hips.  I cannot recall the last time I sat on a swing but certainly it was before I got these curves.  Settling in, I gently begin to swing.  

 

And swing and swing and swing. I cannot put my legs under to pump so I hold them straight out, doing all the work with my arms and abs.  (Only as an adult would I notice how swinging works your core).  And glee fills me.  It breaks past the self pity and indulgent guilt. A smile cracks my sullen veneer.  I’ve jumped out of planes and off mountains to get a rush but the simple and childhood act of swinging brings it forth and sustains it.  I no longer care what the world thinks because I realize how silly, how foolish, how absolutely ridiculous it all is.  

I swing and rock out to She & Him until I need to fetch my laundry.  Then I set off, renewed.